Why I am Angry: Part 1

1. The smart people guffawed when George W. said that Jesus was his favorite philosopher, but the rest of us ate it up. In American politics Jesus is pretty much the correct answer to any question beginning with the words "What person...?" It's the answer the American people, who share little other than our love of Jesus, want to hear. When John and Elizabeth Edwards failed to mention Jesus during an entire 60 Minutes interview, I knew they were done for, politically at least.

2. PAT ROBERTSON ENDORSES NEW YORK HOMO-LOVING CATHOLIC CROSS DRESSER!!!! When Giuliani was mayor, he (Jesus-like) lived with the sinners, but for very un-Christ-like reasons (his wife found out he was fornicating. He also wore a dress, a wig, and heavy makeup. That Pat Robertson, of all people, should endorse this man...

...is astonishing. Then again, he did endorse one of the world's most despicable perpetrators of crimes against humanity, Charles Taylor of Liberia. They were business partners.

In the end, Pat decided that he was more afraid of terrorists than immorality: “The overriding issue before the American people is the defense of our population from the blood lust of Islamic terrorists.” Pat had previously stated quite the opposite: the threat to the United States from activist judges, he said, was “probably more serious than a few bearded terrorists who fly into buildings. Robertson, peace out." (He didn't say that last part, but the rest is from the NYTimes.)

What's with the anti-folicular sentiments of the phrase "bearded terrorists," by the way? The 9/11 terrorists were clean shaven. This is a lame attempt to link Moslems and hippies in a kind of vortex of the scruffy spirit of the anti-Christ.

3. My mother has this picture of our bionic Vice-President on her kitchen wall:


John Wayne. Gary Cooper. Clint Eastwood. Tommy Lee Johns. Some men are allowed to wear cowboy hats. Some men are not.

4. Martyr Libby and Lynn Cheney of AEI have written books with racey portions, and no one within their camp has spoken out against them. The New Yorker published an article about it, but that's to be expected. For all Clinton's deviancy, he never wrote a book about a child being repeatedly molested by a bear.

5. Pat Robertson (him again) said that people who get too much plastic surgery "have oriental eyes.". I have a hard time ordering "Oriental" dressing and buying "Oriental" rugs. Maybe I'll send Pat a copy of Edward Said's Orientalism. I



6. Mitt Romney is an astonishing relic of the past. Consider the story of how Romney put the family dog on the roof of the family station wagon on trips to Maine, and how it hence and prolifically lost control of its bowels. Romney dismissed the bleeding hearts who have called the episode cruel, stating:

PETA has not been my fan over the years. PETA was after me for having a rodeo at the Olympics and was very, very upset about that. PETA was after me when I went quail hunting in Georgia. And they're not happy that my dog likes fresh air.

This is what his dog had to say...