The Joys of BB: Part XII Faster Pussycat Kill, Kill!

So we were cruising along at 17 m.p.h. and I was chatting with the labor union representative and Yale grad about the South African Communist Party (SACP) and wondering if we had dropped the Dutch girl who had been an Olympic diver and now studied African development at Johns Hopkins School for Advanced International Studies (SAIS), and the communist asks me...

You wanna join our team?

How did I feel about racing with Team The Bike Rack? I have ridden with Squadra Coppi, Whole Wheel Velo Club, with guys from Capitol Hill, with National Capital Velo Club, with riders from Artemis and Potomac Peddlers.

No one from these teams disagreed with me on Bush's PEPFAR policy (as the Dutch, diving, SAIS student did) or outlined the nuances of the Powell doctrine (as Jonathon, a Swede and SAIS student did), or fixed my cheapo spare tire kit for me because my fingers were too cold (as the owner of The Bike Rack, who I call in my head "Gay Lance Armstrong" did).

Riding with The Bike Rack was easier, sure. This will be their first year of racing. I've ridden their Sunday "no drop" rides, which are leisurely paced. They don't have any Category 1 or 2 riders. None have 3% body fat. The best had the kind of muscular legs only overweight riders can build. The rest were like the communist and me--uninspiring physically. None were major league a-holes.

Gay Lance Armstrong, part owner, helped addicts and druggies for over ten years before opening his bike shop last year. He can ride, too--he's dropped me at will. He rides a sweet custom Seven Titanium with SRAM Red; the guy's a bike geek. His website stated yesterday, but not today, that The Bike Rack is "gay-owned."

I love the idea of riding for a gay-sponsored team. I don't know if that is discriminatory or what. I like the idea of a guy--a really decent, nice guy--who devoted fifteen years of his young life to helping down-and-outers saying, "I'VE DONE ENOUGH GOOD!" and getting all full of rage on his bike and kicking ass and scattering the capitalist over-the-top heteros. I like the idea of Gay Lance Armstrong. I like the idea of being Gay Lance Armstrong's (very hetero) George Hincapie.

G.L. Armstrong, at left

I turned to the communist.

I'm in.